You belong to us.

Last Tuesday Oscar had his second first day of school. In the American school system school starts with kindergarten. In the German school system school starts with the first grade. The first day of school is a very big deal in Germany. The morning started with a service at the nearby Evangelical church. After the program the children paraded from the church to their school carrying their Schultüteen. All the students from the older classes in the schools were lined up along the parade route applauding and shouting words of welcome to the new classes of first graders. The morning concluded with a champagne brunch for the parents while the students met with their new teachers. It was a really neat experience that I should have appreciated more but I was too stubborn to enjoy.

It is no secret I was against his attending German school. My argument was that since we will be in Germany such a short time that any German he learns here will be forgotten after a few years back in the states. In actuality I was concerned he would not fit in at the German school. I was very worried he would be like so many of the "foreigners" I grew up with.

I recall one girl in particular who moved to my school from China when we were in elementary school. Her clothes were different. Her spiral notebooks were different. She had really weird stuff in her lunch box. Her mother did not speak any English. She had to serve as a translator at parent teacher conferences. She did not "fit in" Most of my classmates sat together being smugly American while this child sat alone. After all, the American way is the the only way to be, right? Be like us or you can't be part of us. Shame on all of us. I can't imagine that many of my classmates from then will ever understand what it is like to be a foreigner. They will probably never have the experience of being uprooted from all familiarity. They will never be a stranger in a strange land.

Now I am the parent who does not speak the language of my child's classmates. My husband shopped for school supplies because I did not understand the list. I am already dreading the parent teacher conference. I am scared that he won't be invited on play dates. I am scared that he will be invited on play dates. This scholastic adventure has caused me to retreat even further into my self imposed seclusion. I am afraid to wander too far from home in case he needs me while he is at school. I am afraid he will hate it there. I think I am even more afraid that he will love it there and then love Germany more than America. These are issues that I know will resolve themselves as time goes by. Nothing earth shatteringly awful will occur because my son is in German school.

Last week he came home with a little note. Loosely translated it means "You belong to us." Paul and I are not sure if all the first graders received one or just the foreigners. For some reason this little piece of paper with a little green guy wearing a back pack gave me reassurance and hope for the school year. Who is this green guy? Is he an alien or did the artist just like green? What is in his back pack? Probably the wrong school supplies and a weird lunch. Maybe he doesn't have the 150 euro back pack like all the other kids. Maybe his Mom bought the $30 backpack from Children's Place. None of that matters, because he belongs. Notice the note did not say "you are just like us." It doesn't day "you should be more like us and then we will like you." It simply stated that our son, a foreigner, was one of them. I think we could all learn something from this simple statement. People need to belong to one another no matter what. If someone belongs to you the differences don't matter. If more people belonged to each other there would be less problems in the word. There would be less war and more charity. I am often guilty of trying to disregard people that I think don't belong in my life. This note gave me a lot to think about. I should try to belong here in Germany and wherever else life's road may take me. Hopefully I can gather more people to belong to me along the way.